Someone Got A Pa-Ta

The setting: I had a wedding to go to this past weekend (pictures to come later) and I had nothing to wear that would fit my body. Nothing. My body is completely dis-proportioned at this point, 6 weeks post-partum, and I just found out at my 6 week appointment with the midwife that this is pretty much the body I'm stuck with. No more shrinking unless I exercise. Pilates, she said. Walk 40 minutes a day. Okay, okay. So I have to find XL shirts and blouses, and bottoms anywhere between 10 and 14 that can squish around my new shapeless excess in the front of me.

So I went shopping.

I don't like shopping, really. I don't have the money to spend on things that are trendy, and I don't have the creative fashion sense to search for things at a bargain that I can put together to look, shall we say, hip. In fact, I really enjoyed shopping for maternity wares, because at least I knew I could find cute and appropriate outfits that didn't have to make my belly or boobs look smaller.

I went to 4 stores in one day. I bought a zip-up sweater. That's it. Unfortunately, one cannot wear a sweater by itself to a wedding. So I raided my wonderful neighbor's closet and found a few things, but none that would work together. (She and I are pretty opposite. I have no butt to speak of and am working with nearly F-sized boobs. (Translation: I'm a 38DDD.) (Ugh.) She has a booty to work with and is not so endowed.) I went shopping again with my borrowed wardrobe in mind. But this time I went to Targ*t, a nice simple outfits-laid-out-for-you kind of store. I found a few things. Whew. I still have very little to wear that fits, but I got what I needed to.

And I got something special for Kindred:


He saw the box and exclaimed, "Pa-Ta!" I don't know how he learned this. Michael and I have read him a book about a potty one time a piece, just last week. We haven't really talked about potty-training with him, and we call our own big potty the toilet. So I'm not certain how he was certain this was a "pata", but he knew. He carried it around the apartment for a while, then put it in the bathroom next to ours, turned it the way he wanted it, sat and smiled.

He hasn't given it another glance since.